My superhero...

This Halloween, Cole definitively knew weeks ago what he wanted to be. I thought for sure when I first asked him back in early September that he would say a ninja or a football player but I was wrong. Without hesitation and to my surprise he said "Spiderman". He had gone through a superhero phase earlier this year but his accumulated action figures had begun collecting dust already and his interest in watching Superhero Squad Show was short-lived. We perused the internet looking for a great costume, because I hate cheap costumes. I know, I know, it is ridiculous to spend money on something they wear maybe twice for the season but I just have always cringed at crappy kid's flimsy Halloween gear. So we settled on the muscular (padded) Spiderman ensemble that we came across complete with gloves, a webshooter wand and socks (not just shoe covers). He had seen a "real" mask at SuperTarget the week before that he really wanted (it talked), so we added that (after he had earned it with good behavior) and voila, his Halloween 2012 get-up was complete.

He got to dress up during the school day for their holiday party and then again for trick or treating that evening. He isn't much of a "sweets" kid so asking for candy from strangers (though less intimidating for him than in year's past) was still not terribly exciting. I guarantee that we will have candy in the house until well past Christmas. We made it to 20-25 houses or so before he had had enough.

To date, he has been a monkey (2007), a devil (2008), a prince (2009), an airforce pilot (2010)and a race car driver (2011).

Cole's First Sleepover...

Cole had been asking to have a sleepover with a friend for weeks. I was all for it but I wanted to be sure that we choose a friend where both would be okay being with one another for 16 hours or so. At almost 6 years old, many times the kids want to do different activities and are willing to compromise for an hour or so but after that things can get dicey. Cole can be overly sensitive too when friends don't follow his "rules" or respect his toys so I wanted it to be a positive experience if I could.

Max is his long time friend and fellow kindergartner. Both Cole and Max are bright, inquisitive and relatively gentle with one another. We finally got a date on the calendar and Max came ready with his sleeping bag and hungry for pizza. They played well together and were excited to be sleeping downstairs in the basement "fort" on the air mattress. Dave hooked them up with headlamps and a movie and we let them unwind for awhile. They were laughing it up every time we ventured to check on them. Finally we had to say lights out and they drifted off. Cole off course woke up before dawn and wanted to know when Max would wake up. :-) We made chocolate chip pancakes and bacon, Max had two helpings. They were sad when it was time for Max to go home and we promised to do it again soon!

5 years and counting...

It is hard to believe that I have been regularly posting to this blog for five years! When Cole was 10 months old, I knew I wanted to find a way to capture in words more moments than I could ever find room to cram into a scrapbook or scribble in a journal. Beginning this blog allowed me to meld both the visual (photographs) with the commentary. To look back and read my earlier work is like taking a ride back in time. The things I wrote about back then seem so distant and yet so familiar. It is amazing how your mind remembers tidbits but not details so I am so grateful to know that I can peruse those adventures, emotions and awe of years ago, and not let them get tucked away to deeply in the recesses of my memory.

232 posts about motherhood, Cole's antics, growth and interests and our journey in navigating life's maze together...I look forward to the years ahead and all they hold (and the next 232 posts that tell about them).

Our Football Fanatic...

I posted back in late August about Cole's new and rapidly growing interest in football, specifically our Minnesota NFL team, the Vikings. Well, nearly seven weeks later, I am here to report that we have a full-fledged fan on our hands. I am not at all joking when I say that Cole is living and breathing football. He wants to play football in the afternoons after school and wear his Vikings helmet and jersey around the house at all times (even while brushing his teeth, see pic above). He stops mid-sentence when football highlights come on the TV. He inquires as soon as a game is over when the next game is, who are they playing, is it an away or home game and so on and so on.

He is beginning to know the players and their numbers. He is understanding more than just the basics of how the game is played. He provides a play-by-play analysis of his own which is quite spot-on. He already dislikes the Green Bay Packers, though I have no idea, seriously, why, because Dave and I are not fans or foes really of any team.

It is just beyond entertaining to see Cole embrace this sport without much previous exposure. Luckily for him, the season is long and hopefully our local team will do well this year. Stay tuned.

The Denhams...

We hadn't had any "formal" pictures taken of our family since our photo shoot during our vacation in the Outer Banks with my extended family back in September 2010. Two years later, it was time to update my frames and thus I needed someone to come and capture Dave, Cole, Tucker and I.

Cole's Montessori school had hired the talented photographer Lisa Buth the past several years to photograph the kids so we have been blessed with amazing pictures of Cole each fall. This year with Cole attending public schools, we would not have that opportunity so I coordinated with Lisa to come and photograph our family instead!

We chose Loring Park in Minneapolis as our backdrop with its gardens, towering oak and walnut trees, ponds, and cool architectural details (bridges, buildings, benches). It was a brilliant autumn afternoon, a bit breezy but with blue skies.

It was a casual hour or two of walking around and snapping photos as Lisa saw the perfect "setting" or lighting. Cole could run around and Tucker would be happy just being with us outside.

As we anticipated, Lisa's photographs came out and wowed us. Here are a few of the standouts!

Soccer 2.0

Cole had such an awesome experience with his summer soccer team that as soon as it was over in late July, he wanted to know when he could play again! So I registered him for the fall season, hoping that autumn weather would continue late into October. When we got our roster assignment, I was so excited to share with Cole that Will, a playdate pal of his from ECFE years ago was on his team and that Will's dad was his coach.

Cole is always a wee shy still when he starts something new but soon into his first practice, he was at ease. The St. Louis Park soccer association has held two drill sessions with talented instructors for Cole's age group which has been a nice change from his regular practices. Unlike with his summer team which were a group of VERY energetic personalities, the kids on his fall team really have begun to work as a unit (still with some comedic moments). Sometimes they win and sometimes they lose but Cole has certainly improved and become quite skilled with the ball. Of course like most almost-six year olds, he has been reluctant to pass the ball but when he does so he does so very well. One month into the season, we have spent some Saturdays watching games basking in near 70 degree sunshine and spent several Saturdays bundled up against a windchill. Welcome to Minnesota in the fall.

The fall soccer program is a shorter six week stint and I'm sure as we wrap things up, Cole will be asking about when he can play again. Unfortunately, it will be a long winter of waiting. Hopefully, his avid interest in football will placate him until the ground thaws in six months.

004 from David Denham on Vimeo.

My support team...

I have been so lucky the past three years to have such a fantastic support team as I trained and ran 11 half-marathons. It was important "therapy" for me back in 2010 to find something to dig my heels into as I recovered from our loss in January 2010. Though my body was recovering from the trauma of the ruptured ectopic, my mind still struggled. Hence, my decision to begin running again with these goals in mind.

That first summer, I registered and ran 3 half-marathons. Dave ran the first one with me (well, not WITH me but in the same race). I vividly remember hitting a wall at mile eight only to see his smile as he looped past me on the return path motivating me to continue on. I trained longer for subsequent races that year and felt strong and accomplished. Near the finish line for two of that year's races, Cole sitting atop Dave's shoulders cheered me on through the final shoot.

My first race of 2011 was a cold and blustery early May day. It felt more like March than May and the wind coming off Lake Minnetonka was unrelenting. Dave and Cole rode the route in the truck and found me about mid-way to give me a boost and found me again at the end where my cheeks were chapped and my feet cold but I was oh so happy that I finished. Three more races that summer with my loyal cheerleaders dropping me off early at the starting lines and meeting me with their waves and blown kisses as I completed another 13.1 miles.

My goal for 2012 is five races, consecutively building each year. I have tackled four of them thus far with my first B2B (back to back), two half-marathons with less than a week in-between. Surprisingly, despite some bruised toenails, my body has acquiesced and allowed me to conquer the mileage. I haven't been able to beat my best time of 2:04 but I am pretty happy with myself regardless that I have dedicated myself to this cause, myself. LOL

I think it has been good for Cole to see me committed to something that means a lot to me. He gets excited when it is race day and he even wants to be sure he wears something that will make it easier for me to see him (like a red shirt or hat). He has even asked me if there are kid races. There are and I'd be happy to get him involved next summer (most entries require them to be six years old).

Imagination...a life skill...

I know it is not easy on Cole being an only-child. He loves to play and wants someone to play with him! However, Dave and I cannot accept his every invitation to build, race, kick the ball or play hotel. Playdates as plentiful as I have tried to maintain them are more difficult now that everyone has varying activities and schedules. So sometimes grudgingly, Cole retreats to his playroom to find something to do. The guilt I feel when he frowns and stomps off is relieved when I hear him ten minutes later using his imagination and creativity to entertain himself. This is a crucial life skill which in my opinion is becoming lost in his generation with over scheduled kids and too much TV/computer/device time for many of them.

I believe Cole has a nice balance of alone time, sports/activity and electronic media. Sure, some days, it leans towards one more heavily but overall, I'm glad to know he can find his own way out of being bored. I love that he will run through the house playing various football positions giving a play-by-play analysis. I revel in the prolific artwork that adorns my desk, the refrigerator and his playroom walls. I smile when I hear him lower his voice in "conversation" as he talks to the "other" superhero/ninja.

I have no doubt that Cole would prefer to have a real person engage with him but I also have no doubt that the fact that he can't all the time makes him work different areas of his brain that would otherwise go dormant and that can only be a positive thing in this world that grabs for our attention 24/7. We all need a little "alone" time.

Another "first"...

I remember the moment you were born amidst the bright lights of the OR, hearing you yowl at being evicted after such a lengthy labor; all I could see were your feet since the drape was blocking my view, thus I commented on how large they were and to this day, that vision flashes before me...

I remember endlessly walking circles with you for almost four months in our Washington, DC brownstone's main level pleading with you to stop your colicky crying.

I remember watching you sleep so peacefully since it was such a rare event.

I remember your first smile, your first words, your first foods, your first steps, your first birthday. As your mom, I remember them all as they slowly weave together to form who you are and are yet to become.

I realize that each "first" means you are one step further away from depending on me and relying on yourself and that is how it should be.

As you got on the big yellow bus yesterday to embark on a new and exciting adventure, I was so thrilled to see you so excited. You showed no apprehension, just a curiosity and confidence that made me proud. I hugged you extra tight as the bus rounded the corner and you squirmed away as you wanted to watch it come down our block. Dad and I waved as you bounded aboard and took your seat, not looking back, just ahead. We waited as the bus turned and headed out of sight. My feet remained glued to the corner as the tears rolled down my face. I was so happy for you and yet felt such melancholy as the morning was such a bittersweet reminder to my psyche that things were changing.

Some of your "firsts" just etch themselves more vividly in my heart. Your "first" day of kindergarten will definitely be one of those.

Vikings Fan in the making...

Dave is not a football fanatic. He isn't even really a football fan nor could give a hoot about fantasy football unlike many of his friends and colleagues. Sure he'll watch highlights and the occasional ASU game but in the decade I have known him, I'd have to say that the Super Bowl is the only time I've seen him engaged for four quarters (and truly it is more about anticipating the advertisements).

That said, Cole has not been exposed much to professional football and yet, he has been fascinated with all the pre-season trailers that are playing on the TV inquiring about our hometown team, the VIKINGS and asking all kinds of questions about football teams and how the game is played.

Thanks to our next door neighbors who have season tickets, Cole and Dave got to attend a pre-season VIKINGS game last Friday. He was soooo excited to wear a VIKINGS t-shirt and sit in the stands at the Metrodome. It was loud and chaotic but he had a blast.

I have a feeling that his interest in the gridiron is just beginning...

Checked off the list...

Each summer for the past two years, Cole and I have crafted a to-do list of new places to go and see, things to do or try and of course some seasonal favorites such as "get ice cream" and "go to the beach". We did pretty well with crossing things off our sheet and had a ton of fun along the way. Each summer seems to pass faster and faster. I think we have a whole three months and wham, I'm stunned to realize it is mid-August already.

One of the last remaining items was "learn how to ride his bike without training wheels". Our neighbors had a bike the next size up in their garage and donated it to us for the cause. However, the bike was purple which Cole was not happy about. We explained that it was a perfectly great bike to learn from and once he could show us he could do it that a new bike was his! He made a few solid attempts with one awful crash and burn escapade where he lost control and veered off the trail and ended up careening DOWN HILL and literally catapulted over his handlebars into a bush. He shied away from the bike for weeks after that, luckily nothing broken or terribly bruised other than his ego.

We knew we would have to coax him to get back on it and try again knowing he was strong and coordinated enough to master it. Sure enough, with just a wee bit of hesitancy and Dave running along side, in a matter of 15 minutes, he was off to the races, his confidence returning and a huge smile beaming from his face. He will have to continue to practice but Santa will be bringing him a new bike this Christmas (blue and green as requested).

003 from David Denham on Vimeo.

A change of pace...

Cole finished up with Montessori at the very beginning of the month. I had signed him up for day camp for the month of August at LifeTime Fitness and the YMCA, four days a week. This was intentional as I wanted to shake things up a bit to help him transition from three days of preschool to five days of kindergarten which starts in a few weeks. Cole is not a fan of change or of new experiences. He still harbors a reluctance when entering unfamiliar territory. Once he has some time to acclimate, you can find him right in the thick of it but he just simply likes to ease into things.

Knowing my kiddo, I felt that having him participate in our gym's day camp first made a lot of sense. He already knew the facility and many of the childcare staff. He played shy at drop off the first several days but once he made friends and learned the routine, he was running off to meet his buddies and actually cried one afternoon when I picked up because he wasn't ready to leave.

When he switches to YMCA camp next week, it will be another few mornings of elongated goodbyes I'm sure though he'll be attending with three of his playdate pals with whom he'll be in kindergarten with!

It has been hard on me to lose my Mondays with him after all these years. When he begins school next month, we will lose our Fridays together too. I have been oh so lucky to have had that special time with him, working part-time allowing us that. He is growing up and we will inevitably spend less and less dedicated time with one another. That is just how life works, more independent, less dependent on his mom. I hope he has special memories of our "mommy days", I know I'll carry them in my heart always.