Out of the mouth of....

We spent our Thanksgiving Day holiday and long weekend in Colorado this year.  Cole had never met Dave's sisters and families (four cousins).   It meant another Denham road trip which we are near experts at executing. This time it was 15 hours each  way including stops.  There wasn't much to look at in Iowa and Nebraska other than vast farmland but the weather was clear which we were thankful for.  Cole and Tucker both are such road trip warriors.  They have spent many many many hours and miles having adventures criss-crossing the country.  This was the first time though that Cole began with "are we there yet? are we in Colorado?  This is taking a lonnnngggg time!" 

For this getaway and to make things easier we stayed in downtown Denver at a dog-friendly hotel.  We had quite a few hours to fill between visits and a whole morning on Thanksgiving to ourselves.  This year, many stores were open and surprisingly (to me) the parking lots were full.  We took advantage of this odd change to holiday tradition (as it seems fewer and fewer people actually get holidays off anymore) and walked around the HUGE Bass Pro Shop Lodge.  Wow, talk about an experience.  Dave and Cole were like two kids running around.  Cole wanted to sit on every ATV, climb in every boat, play with the monster truck display, race cars in the kid's area and sit in the tents.  I was more of a shopper and decided to splurge on a nice windproof jacket.

We drove around a lot to find parks for Cole and Tucker, headed up to Boulder to see the town and have lunch, and spent time with Aunts Katie, Kelley, and Uncle Sean, Dan and the kids, along with of course enjoying a yummy Thanksgiving dinner (green chiles and cilantro under the skin of the turkey, best bird I've ever had) and lively conversation!  We also enjoyed an evening at the Denver Zoo walking around under the festive holiday lights. 

As we headed out early to begin our trek back to Minnesota, we were trying to get things situated in the truck before leaving the hotel garage.  It was dark, cold and we were all tired.   After a wee bit of grumbling, we got on the highway and watched a beautiful sunrise with the snow-capped Rockies bathed in the morning glow.  Cole was all chatty and being quite funny.  Dave and I had been talking and Cole kept coming up with witty remarks.  Dave goes "you have all the answers huh?" and without a moment's hesitation Cole volleys back "yes, that is what I do". 

Would he like a Job??

So Cole and I take the Volvo over to the dealer for its oil change earlier this week.  We got a coupon for $20 off if we came in between 3:30-5:30pm.  Always waiting for a significant deal on anything, this was an easy discount to take them up on.  Borton Volvo has a great kid's play area too so Cole and I dropped off our car in the bay and headed inside.  He wanted to walk around the showroom especially since they had the crash test dummy set up.  He loved the convertible too and wanted to climb inside but I said no, we could only look.  Then he got all excited when he saw a Volvo with its hood up.  He ran over and started running his hand over the exposed engine with its shiny parts.  The manager and a sales guy were chatting a few feet from us and had given us a smile when we first entered.  Cole edged his way slowly around the front and sides of the car, staring wide-eyed at the engine compartment and said quite loudly, "mommy, it is so beautiful".  I laughed out loud and began to reply when one of the two reps go "that was great, does he want a job?".  Cole got shy at this point since he dislikes being the center of attention but was thrilled when the manager brought him over a Volvo scaled-model car.  He takes a look at it after saying thank you and says "but mommy this isn't our Volvo".  The manager goes "wow, he knows his Volvos huh"?

A mom moment...

Cole caught a bug this week, probably thanks to Dave and I who have been coping with it ourselves. Typically Cole is the carrier but I think things happened in reverse this time. They should make light switches, door knobs, kitchen pulls and faucet handles with anti-microbial resistance finishes.  Maybe that will be my million dollar idea!!

With a terribly runny nose, a dry cough and just an overall icky feeling, Cole mustered through our first (of many I'm sure) winter colds.  I will not send him to school with a cough of any sort.  I just won't no matter how it complicates my ability to work.  As for the runny nose, his sensitive skin breaks down with continuous use of tissues so I have special saline wipes and use an arsenal of homeopathic products to try and avoid chapping his skin any further.  He was a trooper and though a little less energetic than usual, he wanted to play and do the things he normally does. 

He doesn't nap anymore and though once in a blue moon he will fall asleep on the couch or in the car midday, by day's end when he is sick, one can anticipate that PATIENCE be on the menu for dinner as his body is DONE and trying to tell him (and everyone else) so.  Bedtime can be difficult as once overtired he almost becomes manic and trying to subdue him can be a test. 

On day three of his cold/cough, he was working on fumes as we finished up reading our books.  He wanted me to snuggle with him.  As I wrapped my arms around him and began to feel his breathing slow (although raspy), he turns to me and says "mommy sing to me".

In that moment, I felt the tears spring to my eyes as it had been many many months since I sang him lullabies.  I used to sing to him every night and then one evening last winter he had said "mommy I don't want you to sing to me anymore".  I remember that so vividly because it was like a dagger to my heart.  It was him sharing that he didn't need that from me anymore.  I also remember replying "okay buddy",  got him settled with lights out and my upbeat "sweet night nights" then leaving his room with tears rolling down my face.

Now he wanted the comfort of my off-tune voice.  Ever so briefly,  my mind scanned itself to bring up the lyrics and melodies of those stashed away lullabies.  I began to hum them at first and soon the words were flowing out.  I sang for 10 minutes or so and watched his face soften and his hands go limp.  I would have stayed there all night and sang to him.  I was so touched that in his sickness he still needed something from me that was far beyond providing a sleeve to wipe his nose on.  It was certainly another mom moment...

My Little "Maverick"

We went to the Air Show in St. Cloud in June and we ended up spending the entire day there since there was so many jaw-dropping aeronautics taking place.  The Blue Angels and the Stealth Fighter Jet were the most amazing.  We were on the hunt for the Blue Angels replica jet as soon as we saw another little boy with one.  Cole is still playing with it though its one wing has been superglued together numerous times.

I got the idea for Cole's Halloween costume after attending that show as I thought how cool that would be to dress up in a jumpsuit with patches, a helmet and dog tags.  Cole's grandfather Denham and Great-Grandfather Roger were both military pilots.  So I searched high and low until I found what I wanted.

Halloween is still a bit challenging for Cole since he is wary of strangers and understandably questions why we want him to dress up and go up to the doors of people he doesn't know to get candy (and he doesn't like candy except for lollipops) but I think in due time, he will begin to embrace the holiday.

My little observer...

Driving back from school one day last week, we were on Rt. 394 and the winds were howling. The low pressure storm that had sat on us for two days had brought down tree branches and made the house shake. I had both hands on the steering wheel trying to keep the Volvo from being blown into the other lanes. The gusts could quite literally do that as I watched other cars less prepared sway in and out like they were being driven by drunk drivers.

Cole and I got off the highway headed towards home and a plastic bag swirled up out of nowhere and came directly at the car. It bounced off the Volvo's hood and danced away as if twirling to a symphony. From the back seat I heard Cole pipe up and say matter of factly "well, that's not something you see everyday". As I cracked up at his adult-like observation, he looked at me as I smiled at him in the rear-view mirror and in all seriousness said "well, you don't".

My little "fix-it" man...

Super-Glue, scotch tape, a dedicated drawer of batteries, doll-house sized tools and some engineering mom magic have saved many of Cole's toys from landing in the trash. I make a diligent attempt at salvaging whatever truck/car/engine/digger has malfunctioned, lost a part, stopped turning or whirling or is just dying a slow death due to its much-loved status. I swear that the quality control they use for testing the 3-5 year old BOY range of toys doesn't come close to reality. How many stairs do they drop them down? Do they truly put them through front end "crashes"? Are they stepped on repetitively? Is every part that moves twisted and turned a billion times?

Typically he is my captive audience as I mumble and moan inwardly (or not so inwardly) trying to either jury rig a fix, remove a screw the size of a pin head or prevent Super-Glu from touching anything other than the intended target (I'm successful 6/10 times on that since the parts are so tiny that the pliers slip 6/10 times).

Cole peppers me with questions (as I continue to try to keep my potty mouth from actually escaping my lips) and I do my best to describe what I am doing and why since he is so curious about EVERYTHING. Sometimes I can give the toy back after it has been through the "mom shop" but other times I have to prop it up to dry or set. Cole looks longingly at it and asks every minute "is it ready yet?"

Cole is as careful as a four year old boy can be expected to be with his things but unfortunately he is learning that sometimes things cannot be repaired, that his mom will give a valiant effort but in the end, sometimes we have to just simply say good-bye and adopt the next item with wheels from the playbin. Luckily, though he does have allegiance to a handful of toys, he is still young enough that he gets over his grief quickly.

So the other day, I hear him tinkering around downstairs while I am prepping dinner. As most moms can relate to, the normal sounds of play are what we unconsciously "listen" for. No matter how involved we may be in whatever activity we are engaged in, if it gets too quiet or the "sounds" are unfamiliar, an immediate investigation is required.

It had gotten eerily quiet and when I called down to him, he didn't answer BUT I could hear him moving around. I dropped the onion I was chopping and grabbed the kitchen towel, ran down the stairs and found Cole near my desk with a truck in his hand whose bumper had come off. He gave me a sheepish smile until I started laughing uncontrollably whereas a huge grin erupted on his cute mug. He had taken the scotch tape from my office and torn off about 25 itty bitty pieces and plastered the bumper back on. He held it out to me and said "look mom, I fixed it"!! The bumper was still hanging off precariously but he was all proud of himself for taking the initiative. I was so proud of him for doing the same that I felt tears well up in my eyes.

143 Posts...

It has been three years this month that I began writing pieces for this blog, THREE YEARS...holy toledo, that is 36 months of capturing in words my role as a first time mom and approximately 1080 days of content for sharing snippets of our lives as Cole experienced the world around him and we came along for the ride.

My original posts tended to lean heavy on what becoming a mom meant to my identity, as it seemed in a flash I was no longer who I had been before December 6, 2006. My name was the same, my face was the same but internally I felt like a stranger in my own skin. In those early years, Cole's presence I felt right down to my bones, literally and figuratively. I will never forget those initial months when his colic ruled my every waking hour. It was the most all encompassing period that my heart, mind and soul had ever been forced to reckon with. There was so much change to so many aspects of my life that I was both overwhelmed and overjoyed and trying to find a happy medium. The roller coaster of emotions in that first year or two was truly life altering and though I knew as I held Cole in my arms the night of his delivery that I would never be the same, I could have never have been less prepared for what was ahead of me. Parenthood shapes you without a doubt, some days like a bat whacking you over the head, while other days it comes at you gently like falling rain.


The intensity of parenthood is constantly changing, its dynamics insisting on shifting when you least anticipate it and for someone like me who previously liked life to be in neat bundles, scheduled and expected, becoming a mom has been a lesson about living in the present and reveling in the moment(s)because I already find myself pondering "where have the past four years gone"?

Life is much easier these days and my blog posts now are more about the quirky, witty, smart and funny "stuff" that Cole entertains us with. He is a comedian, a scientist, a bookworm, a picky eater, a giggler, a snuggler and very much a BOY! I'm so lucky and grateful everyday for having him grace our lives.

He can do so many things without me now and though a relief in large part, a sadness envelopes me at times when I think of things he no longer needs me for. The push and pull of his growth and development is a constant reminder that Cole is forging his way in this crazy world and finding the ways in which he can best navigate life's maze. Thankfully, for now, he does still need my guiding hand.

So I look forward to the next 143 posts as a raise my rascal one day at a time...

OBX Moments 2010

We had a grand two weeks in one of our favorite destinations...here is a little video of all the moments I was able to capture...

Despite the weather...

We take two weeks of vacation each September in the Outer Banks since our trek from Minnesota takes so long to/from. It truly is ridiculous to drive 26 hours each way for just 6 days so we make it worth our while and settle into beach mode for a bit longer. One week is just us four (some years friends from the DC area join us) and the second week we rent a bigger home and my extended family and parent's best friends party under one roof. This year we had a smaller group as some outside commitments kept some people from being able to join us.

Our first week, the weather was picture perfect, 80 degree weather and cloudless skies. We did a lot of "firsts" with Cole this year, climbed the Hatteras Lighthouse, went kayaking, took the car ferry over to Ocrakoke Island as well as continued our tradition of favorite activities. Driving on the beach and having stretches of it all to ourselves to swim, fish, run, wander and beachcomb and where Tucker can roam without a leash has to be one of my top five things to do in life.

Our second week unfortunately has been a wash out weather-wise. One day of sun (when this picture was snapped) followed by the past four days of rain and/or gray gloomy skies. We have snuck the kids out to the beach whenever the radar indicated a break but those have been too few and far between. The winds picked up today so strong that even walking outside near the house you get sandblasted. So we have made the most of the time indoors, baking brownies, reading books, playing with blocks and games, watching movies and running up and down the long hallways (well the kids have that is)! Cole has had some dedicated time with Gigi and Pop Pop and the past few nights at our family dinners he commented "this is fun"! Sure, it would have been nice to have our days spent beach side of course but after the rocky start medically I had to 2010, I am just grateful to be enjoying the closeness of family.

Another Denham Road Trip Adventure...

Dave and I met in Boston in 2001. Next summer, it will be a decade that we have known one another. In those 10 years, we have logged more miles on the road as a couple (I won't even attempt to add up Dave's individual miles) than anyone else I know. Two cross country moves required two cross country journeys of course. From Beantown to San Francisco via the northern tier of the U.S. Once on the left coast we traveled in our Jeep Cherokee to Lake Tahoe, Oregon, Mendocino, Sonoma, and Monterey. We then left our hearts in the City by the Bay and ventured east this time across the southern states. Once settled in our nation's capital, we took day trips to Baltimore, Virginia Beach and bi-annual trips to our favorite destination, the Outer Banks. Our lives changed with the birth of Cole and we found ourselves on our 3rd move (4th actually move since we rented first and then bought a house in DC) in 5 years, this time to the Twin Cities. Packing up Cole who was five months old, the Jeep was weighing heavy as we followed Dave and Tucker in the loaded Penske truck as we made our way to our new home with its yard, fence and suburban zip code.

Having Cole has not curbed our appetite for road trips, we realized early on that we had more control traveling in our car than flying and because we prefer to take our canine kid with us as much as possible, we continue our quest to drive here, there and everywhere.

Cole is a road tripper extraordinaire. With long drives to Pennsylvania, Montana, Kansas and our annual treks to Outer Banks, he just knows what the deal is. We stop thanks to GPS at playgrounds to let both kids stretch and play but we spend hours on end in the truck, Cole watches the big rigs go by, has his own personal movie theatre and passes the time adeptly using our Iphones (wow, the applications for kids are amazing and educational). A cooler and snack bag keeps us from having to stop too often. Just like when he was a baby, the soothing movement of the truck traveling at high speed (and Tucker snoring) makes him nod off. Sure he has his meltdowns but they truly are few and far between.

This post is being written two days after our 26 hour and 1400+ miles journey to Hatteras Island, NC. As you can see from the photo included, Cole has a smile on his face as Dave snapped this on a pitstop, what great memories we hope we are creating for him as these road trip adventures weave their way into our family fabric!

Look Mommy...

At the start of the year, I began "lunching" with Cole, just him and me every other Friday. Cole is great at restaurants as I think the fact that Dave and I have taken him out to eat quite often in his almost four years, he knows what to expect and what we expect of him when we are enjoying a meal out!

Anyway, I thought it would be a nice Mommy/Son thing to do after we run our typical Friday morning errands to lunch together. We frequent kid-friendly places of course and he 9/10 times will order Mac-N-Cheese. He is not a protein eater, never has been. Thank goodness he drinks tons of milk and eats cheese and eggs. I wonder how he has grown so tall despite continuing to eat like a bird?

So last week we hit Whole Foods and then walked (or ran since it was raining) to Noodles and Company. He likes to choose a table by the window and ask a million times when our food is going to come. So our food arrives and I stir it up and move some of his Mac-N-Cheese from the scorching bowl to his plate in an attempt to cool it off. While he waited as patiently as a 3 1/2 year old can while looking at his food, two gentleman sat down at the table next to us. They smiled and said hi, Cole got all shy and coy and turned away as usual.


After several minutes of watching the steam stream from his plate, I finally give him the go-ahead and he digs in and begins chowing, cheese dripping into his lap, on his cheek...we kept laughing because it is really hard to eat Mac-N-Cheese without making a mess.

The server delivered food to the two men who sat down besides us and Cole's eyes go big...he can barely swallow his food fast enough before he "whispers" loudly..."look, mommy, that man got mac-n-cheese like me"...I said, "he sure did"...Cole with a totally incredulous tone goes "so big people can eat mac-n-cheese too? that is soo cool" The guy eating the mac-n-cheese couldn't help but overhear him, smiled and gave Cole a wink. Cole got bashful again but beamed a big smile back!

PeeeeYewwww

Driving the 11 miles west to Cole's school we drive past some invisible wildlife crossing, well not exactly invisible since unfortunately, it is in the area of Route 394 where the speed limit goes from 55mph to 65mph. That said, sadly it is the worst place for animals to attempt to make it to the other side of the road. Gladly, Cole is typically distracted by the various construction and large Semi trucks we see and thus has yet to ask about the roadkill. However, the other morning approaching the ramp we take to exit to his school, the fresh and pungent smell of a skunk filled the car.

Cole: "Mommy what is the smell, it is icky" (as he holds his nose)

Me: "That is a skunk" (as I see it's remains off to the side)

Cole: "Well, it needs a bath, it must be really dirty" (as he continues to crinkle up his nose at the now stronger than before odor)

Me: *Laughing* (Pondering the thought of explaining the skunk was dead and then thinking better of it since some things are better off left unsaid)