Happy and content...

I think the most rewarding, heart warming and downright fantastic moment is when at the end of a day, after Cole and I have read books and turned out his lights, snuggled in with his eyes barely able to remain open, he softly says "mommy, I loved this day and I love you because we had so much fun" Pure joy runs through my body knowing my little guy is so content and happy. It elevates me to an emotional place I never could have expected.

Geography A +

I just posted a few weeks back about how geographically aware Cole has shown he is per his comments when driving around. The other day while circling in the Costco parking lot, he was looking at the license plates, repeating "Minnesota, Minnesota, Minnesota". NOTE: When we have been on road trips out of state, many times in parking lots, Cole will point out that a car isn't from Minnesota because it has a different license plate. As we made our way down the aisle looking for a vacant spot, Cole piped up from the backseat excitedly "Mom, look, that car is from TEXAS!!" Astounded to find he was indeed correct, I asked him how he knew that. With a shrug of his shoulders he goes "I just do". Baffled, I tried to remember if we had ever seen a Texas plate in our travels and I couldn't recall. We do have a map of the United States in his playroom and he has learned about the fifty states through books and Montessori but for him to recognize the license plate which does have the shape of Texas outlined but very small between the first set of numbers and the second was just plain darn impressive. He definitely has a keen sense of observation and sees the details in everything; watching him use these skills gives me a sense of delight and a sneak preview of all the interesting things he will surprise us with in the years to come.

Cole (isms)...

Here are some of the latest and greatest Cole(isms). You never know when they will pop out of his mouth so their unexpectedness adds significant value and entertainment. Enjoy!

We were making cookies one afternoon and as Cole stirred things up for me in the bowl, I kept adding ingredients. The dough was getting stiffer as I added in flour and Cole goes "mom, I think you put in enough dust".

Out on the boat, Cole was determined to fish despite the fact that he had tangled the line in his rod for the umpteenth time and Dave's rod had unfortunately gone overboard. I knew Dave was short on patience so I tried to change Cole's activity to coloring since we had brought cars and other distractions since the water is still too cold to swim in. He didn't want anything to do with me having spent the entire day prior with me inside since it had rained. I was trying desperately to give Dave some peace but on a 21 foot boat there isn't a place to "hide". Dave had his eyes closed and I said "daddy is trying to relax". Cole climbs up on him with his crayons in hand and says "Daddy, coloring is very relaxing!"

Spring came six weeks later than it did last year and thus, we are just now seeing things bloom and the rabbits, squirrels and other creatures return. The other day as we passed the park on our way to the gym, an albino squirrel scampered towards the curb. I quickly pointed him out to Cole as he darted back towards the big walnut tree. Cole goes "mom, what happened to his paint?"

My little bird...

This picture says it all and at least recently is the extent to what we can get Cole to eat at any given time. We have struggled the past six weeks with him and eating. He has always been a grazer and a slow eater, taking over an hour at times to finish his meals but lately our frustration (his and ours) has been mounting. We don't want to force him to eat but he simply needs to eat with the amount of activity he expends.

He drinks enough milk to make a plausible case for buying our own cow but even when we limit his intake of that with hopes of increasing his appetite, he just balks at eating much more than a few pieces of fruit, some noodles and a protein bar. He refuses meat protein other than turkey hot dogs and always has. We have even joked that he will be a vegetarian; although he doesn't like many vegetables either.

He puts on a performance quite worthy of an Academy Award Winner with instantaneous tears and dramatic airs that would usurp most soap opera divas when we ask him to finish what is on his plate. He says he is tired, his tummy hurts, he wants to take a rest, he is full, yada yada yada yada....and yet, 2 minutes later, he is racing around.

So this morning as I vainly attempted to get him to eat his breakfast, I said with impatience "Cole, if you don't eat well, you won't be able to grow tall and strong and become a race car driver". Without even a moment's hesitation, he retorts "but Mom, I don't want to grow up, I want to stay a little boy forever so I can race with you" He even threw in his impish smile as if he knew very well that tugging at my heartstrings would end this ongoing argument (at least for now). *sigh*

Any suggestions are welcome!

I hear the wind among the trees Playing the celestial symphonies; I see the branches downward bent, Like keys of some great instrument. ~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

We are so lucky to live three houses away from a large local park, Oak Hill. Some of the towering walnut trees have to be hundreds of years old. Sadly, age, disease and/or lightning strikes have damaged quite a few of these beautiful landmarks. Over the past few weeks, we have heard the buzz of chainsaws and the distinct sound of the wood chipper as some of these monuments have been taken down and turned into dust.

One of the trees near the playground that we frequent had been cut into large pieces and lay on their sides. I had shown Cole that the middle of the tree was unfortunately hollow which meant it was sick and in danger of falling over if they had not cut it down. His eyes got all big and he goes "mommy, don't touch it, it has germs because it is sick and we don't want to get sick too". He took a wide berth of the fallen giant every time he circled the playground during his race game, giving it the wary eye as if it was going to sneeze or cough, LOL.

I hope the park decides to plant new trees in the place of the ones that had grown there for so long as though we wouldn't see them grow to the same magnificent stature in our lifetime, it would be comforting to know that someday they would look down on generations of children to come as they played in the same park I watch Cole gleefully scamper about now.

My mini-navigator...

Pulling from the vaults of my memory bank, I believe that I was always interested in geography and maps (mom/dad I think can confirm that??). I remember vividly flipping through the Rand McNally's Road Atlas (the one that was as big as a newspaper page) when we took family road trips; I was fascinated by the unique shapes of the states and the distinct "veins" of highways and secondary roads that coursed through them; dad's road atlas was always dogeared and ratty by year's end from use (and from being tucked down between the seats); thus he would get the updated version EVERY year! I loved following our routes as we headed for whatever destinations. I have also always had a strong sense of direction and an innate ability to navigate well. Maybe that is why Dave and I have done so many road trips together successfully; he has the DNA of a long-haul trucker and I have the human version of a GPS chip in my brain, LOL.

Luckily it seems, Cole has a bit of both of the aforementioned woven through his genes. Since he was about three years old, it became quite apparent that after just ONE trip anywhere, he would remember landmarks, roads and other signposts when we would return indicating that he had recollection of traveling there before. He recognizes highway ramps and buildings literally after having been there or been past them just ONCE! I think the obvious fact that he not only has an outstanding memory but also quite a significant and uncanny knack for direction is just plain impressive coming from a four year old.

I can only hope that with all his exposure to our miles spent trekking here and there that he too will learn how to read and journey using an "old-fashioned" map (if they still continue to make them!) and love all things about the open road.

Oh, the things that Cole says...

I haven't blogged in several months about Cole's latest and greatest one-liners or fantastic quotes but I sure have been keeping a growing log as he has proven to be quite prolific with them! Some of the things he says seem to be spoken out of the blue and seemingly are a once only phenomenon while other phrases have become part of his repertoire, some cute or witty; others not so much. Regardless, he wows us with his advanced use of vocabulary routinely and his uncanny ability to choose the perfect words for the situation. He observes things I never even have myself, he remembers things after seeing/hearing them once and he inquires about things that I never think a four year old would be curious about. Just goes to show that kids teach us more than we could ever teach them. I digress... here are a few of the more memorable Cole quips from the past several months.

In a soft voice with his eyes fighting the power of sleep he often says "mom, I loved this day"; what a great way to express what a good day it was and for this mom to thrill in knowing how content and happy life is for her little guy.

"Well...xxxxxxxxxxx"....Cole prefaces just about every seven out of ten sentences with the word "Well". Nothing like hearing yourself in your child's choice of often-used expressions. Although then is his common use of the word "totally" both before and after statements. Not sure where he picked up the surfer nomenclature but "dude, please stop".

Since I began my training for half-marathons, I have had some issues with my feet including hot spots and blisters. One afternoon following a run, I was sitting on the couch rubbing my foot and Cole asked if my foot hurt. I said, "yes, I have a blister". He came over to look at it and then matter-of-factly with a touch of dare I say sarcasm stated "oh well, I can't do anything for you".

Making pizza one evening for dinner, I put spinach, onions and fresh tomatoes on mine. Cole who was watching from the kitchen stool goes "mom, why do you want salad on your pizza?"

Several times in recent weeks, Cole has remarked "there is no fish in my milk". It was a very odd thing for him to say and thus I had no idea why he was saying it. So I made the assumption that he must have read it in a book or heard it on TV because when I asked him what he meant, he said "I don't member". The origin of this became known today as he stood in the kitchen as I poured his milk for lunch. He pointed at the tiny icon at the bottom of the Horizon Organic Milk carton where there is a fish with a red line through it with teeny tiny text that says there is no fish oil in it (since he drinks organic milk with Omega DHA in it). It was an A-HA moment for me as here I have poured gallons and gallons of milk, I scrutinize labels on 90% of our foods and cleaning agents and yet, I managed to miss this image that my four year old obviously had.

I think the EB is good for maybe one more year!?

There are pros and cons to the age-integrated classrooms at Cole's Montessori school. Since he moved from the toddler room to the preschool side at age 3, Cole's classmates have ranged in age between 3-5 (sometimes even 6 when the kindergarten class joins them). This exposure to a wide array of social interaction has certainly had its advantages but of course, playing and listening to those children older than him has its downside as well.

We had to curb potty talk immediately when Cole picked up some not so nice use of those terms knowing who had contributed to that vocabulary since his finger still readily points in the direction of those who "say it all the time". He also sometimes tests the waters when running around outside or when playing tag, where I have to shout out not to grab or pull on kid's shirts. He retorts with "I know I know but (insert X and X from school) do it to me" I then have to totally sound like a parent by saying "I'm sorry Cole but you don't like that do you? So why would you do that to someone else?"

We hadn't talked much about the Easter Bunny yet since it was several weeks away but we had seen them setting up his booth at the mall. At that time, Cole had asked what they were doing. I replied with "they are setting up the picture backdrop so kids can have their photo taken with the Easter Bunny". He replied "oh okay, I don't want to do that!", which I already knew. Anyway, one morning after getting back from doing errands, there was mention of the Easter Bunny on SproutTV. He goes "mom, remember I don't want to go see the Easter Bunny, he is scary" I didn't want to make a big deal about it so I said "okay buddy, we don't have to go visit him, he'll still come and leave you an Easter basket" He looked at me funny and said "mom, the Easter Bunny is just a big person in a costume" I paused thinking over my response carefully, as I wasn't sure he was 100% believing that. He followed up with "I mean the Easter Bunny at the mall". I sighed in relief internally recognizing he still believed. I said "why do you think that?" He sheepishly answered "well (insert X from school) said that the Easter Bunny at the mall is silly and it isn't real". Again, now I had to answer thoughtfully, as I know he has looked over Santa and the Easter Bunny at the mall before and looked skeptical and really who came blame him, they are a far cry from the elaborate costumes that I see in the pictures of my sister and I with the aforementioned from my youth. The holidays have gotten so commercial, that the Easter Bunny and Santa have both lost their magic replaced with the cheap synthetic costumes that I wouldn't believe were real either if I were four again.

So I said, "well it really only matters what you think about him not what others may say about him. So what do you COLE, believe?" He goes "well, I don't know, maybe the Easter Bunny at the mall is just for babies and little kids". I said, "well that could be..." again hesitating to fill in his thoughts for him. He then changed direction and said "mom, we can still dye eggs and the Easter bunny will hide them, right?" I excitedly said, "absolutely!!".

I'm afraid he is on the fence as his brilliant mind begins to sadly recognize fact from fiction but hopefully for this year, he will accept a visit from the Easter Bunny and simply enjoy his jellybeans as any four year old should!

World Wide Web Meets 4 Year Old Mind...

I can only imagine how a four year old mind processes the concept of the internet. The world wide web did not come into existence until I was in college and yet now kids of the current generation are growing up in households where there are multiple computers and smart phones logged onto to the WWW 24/7.

It is difficult to explain to Cole how these gadgets work as I myself only have a very simple working knowledge. He understands that new games come from my "puter" and I plug my IPHONE into it to download them. He comprehends that Mommy and Daddy's "puters" have different movies and games (he prefers Dave's IPAD but who can blame him!?).

Anyway, the other day when a package arrived from the UPS man, Cole inquired what was in the box. I told him it was his new comforter for his big boy bed, as we had just finally gotten around to buying him an awesome bookcase bed frame; poor kid has been on a mattress/boxspring on the floor since he broke his arm at 20 months. He remembered me showing him it when I ordered it as he said "mommy, it is the same one that was on your "puter"". I agreed and thought nothing more of it.

A few days later, Cole wanted to look at race car tracks on the "puter". So I googled NASCAR and came up with a few sites including some items on Amazon. When he saw the Amazon site, he got all excited. We flipped through a few search pages and clicked on a few tracks to look at them in detail. He pointed at one and said "I like that one" but we continued on looking and eventually he lost interest and walked away.

The next day, Cole kept asking about the postman and when he was coming. It was an odd question since he had never mentioned the postman previously. I just thought he had a new found interest in when the mail came. Finally, his anticipation was bubbling over and he blurted out "well, mommy, you clicked on the "puter" yesterday so my racetrack should be here soon right!?" It was an "a-ha" moment for me as I realized that maybe I shop online just a wee too much.

Why....

Cole has always disliked wearing button down shirts or anything with a collar. I can't blame him really, they do tend to be more confining and restrictive than t-shirts. However, simply there are times where he needs to be more dressed up.

Recently, I was putting him in a button-down as he had field trip to the Children's Museum with his school. He squirmed and fidgeted as I did my best to align his slim arms into the sleeves without creating any bunching. I kept getting the rolled eye glare like I was making him eat broccoli or drink carrot juice. As I made once last attempt to straighten his shirt and comb his hair, he gives me a huge sigh and says "why do I have to be so handsome?" All I could do was burst into laughter and reply honestly "because you look just like your daddy!"

Speed Limit 100...

As my Mario Andretti races around the house, I remind him as I watch him veer in a zig zag fashion and see him narrowly miss impact with the door frame that he must be a careful racecar driver and remain in control, less he spin out, careen into a wall and lose the race. With the utmost conviction in his voice, Cole replies "...but mom, I have to go 100 miles ago to win!". I laugh out loud and say "you mean 100 miles an hour?" He looks at me with such exasperation and says "no, mom 100 miles ago, I'm just playing pretend!"

So you don't forget...

So sadly in recent weeks, I have had to have conversations with Cole about what death means.

In late February, Cole's close buddy Benjamin's doggie passed away
and I tried to best explain that when someone/something dies that we care about, they are no longer here for us to see or be with like we have gotten used to but that we have the memories that we have created with them forever and we can always always still love that person/pet. I expressed that when people/pets die they become angels up in heaven. He then asked about heaven (as Dave and I don't go to church, we haven't exactly gotten around to sharing with him about god and heaven). So I said well, heaven is way above the clouds. Angels live in heaven and can fly and see us but we can't see them. I then began tripping over myself as I didn't want to say too much and confuse him.

Cole seemed to grasp the idea that Benjamin's doggie was "gone" but bless his four year old innocence when he said "well don't be sad mommy, Benjamin's doggie can fly".

Two weeks later, shocking news of our next door neighbor's father's car accident and death. It knocked the breathe out of me as I read the text that Debbie sent. I sat down on the couch barely able to dial the phone to inform Dave. A tragedy beyond comprehension that had us reeling since we had gotten to know Dave Brekke over the past several years. I was so sad and cried openly in front of Cole. He came over and asked "mommy why are you feeling this way?". He hugged me as I explained that Jesse's (our neighbor) daddy was killed in an accident, that he had died. His eyes got big as he stated "so he is not here anymore, right?" I nodded and he goes "...but mommy, it is okay to be sad but Jesse's daddy is an angel now" which just made me cry harder as I listened to my little boy try to make ME feel better.

Two days later, Jesse came over into our yard with Coogee his lab. I had said the day before to Cole, that he should draw Jesse a picture. He had said he would and took off to do so. I honestly had forgotten about it. Cole ran downstairs when he saw Jesse and came back with a sheet of paper with blue circular squiggles and his name written on it. He then proceeded to tell Jesse as he handed him the paper that "here are the clouds where your daddy lives now". Jesse asked if he could take the picture to show his mom. Cole matter of factly retorts "sure but don't forget to bring it home to put on your refrigerator so you don't forget to look up at the clouds"

Until it was necessary, I never knew how difficult it could be to define death and make sense of it in the most honest way he could understand. As an adult, death, especially when it comes unexpectedly doesn't make sense to me but as a parent, my role is not to interject my personal feelings but to give Cole enough information to feel comfortable enough to come up with his own interpretation. Obviously, he has done exactly that.