A lesson in sunsets by Cole...

Cole has had limited experiences with sunsets. In the wintertime, it is too cold to watch the sunset plus it kind of just happens during those long frigid months, you blink and the sun is gone way before we have even sat down to eat dinner.

In the summertime, the sun sets way after his bedtime since here in Minnesota at our higher latitude, summer twilight lasts until after 10pm...so our annual September trip to the Outer Banks is really the only time he has seen the sunset. He normally is off his schedule anyway and the sun at that time of year is dropping earlier as fall approaches. So his frame of reference for watching the sun sink has really only been watching it disappear over the waters of the Pamilico Sound.

Lately, he has been a bugger about going to bed. Revved up from his day one past evening, he was still up as the sun began to descend, its light "pinking" up the billowy clouds. He kept saying how "beautiful" it was with that genuine inflection in his voice that said he really meant it.

Then out of the blue he says "the sun is going into the side of the earth". I had no initial reply as I sat there awestruck. I just looked at him as if he had just spoken Latin. I finally overcame my speechlessness with "you are right Cole, the sun comes up on one side of the earth, in the East and sets on the other side, the West". Where did you learn that? at school? His reply "No, I just know it."

Mastering the Art of Deflection

Cole is so emotionally observant it scares me. At just past three and a half, his keen ability to pick up on the slightest nuances in tone and mood in me and others is just uncanny. He truly is a sponge, both consciously and unconsciously absorbing EVERYTHING around him.

Cole has always been a sensitive soul...from his days of colic where he wanted nothing but to be sung to/held/carried to present day when he hangs his head and says "I'm sad" when I've raised my voice, which makes my heart hurt but is inevitable when parenting.

He does not like conflict with his friends (though with me he seems to invite it, LOL) and he gets upset when someone else is upset. He even lowers his voice when he hears a baby crying at the store and says with genuine concern "why is that baby crying"?)

Anyway, Cole has begun to master the art of deflection as a means to soften the situations where he knows he has gotten himself into a pickle, has received a warning and quite aware that a time out is imminent. He quickly attempts to diffuse the gathering storm by stating "wait a minute, I have a good idea!!" This is followed by one of several things in his arsenal "let's go outside", "let's have a snack" "let's go ride my bike"...or my personal favorite "let's bake cookies".

It is like he is cognizant that if he can distract me from whatever it was that had me in a tizzy, he can circumvent further discipline. Where do they learn this stuff?

Outsmarted...

Cole loves Popsicles, however my son is very picky about the kind of Popsicles he will eat. He has been known to turn down a popsicle at school, which during the summer is common for birthday days instead of cake/cupcakes; if he isn't a fan of whatever the birthday kid's mom brought he won't eat it.

Anyway, I have tried all kinds of popsicles; most are full of junk and though I have no problem with the occasional highly processed-filled one, I do try to keep his sweet treats on the natural/organic side, full of REAL fruit. He prefers these anyway it seems as it is the neon colored ones that look "fake" that he typically refuses.

Cole also still eats like a bird and isn't a big fan of proteins. So I recently bought yogurt fruit popsicles in hopes of wooing him and getting more than just carbs into his system. He will eat ice cream/frozen yogurt but he flatly took one look at the popsicle which was roughly similar in color and shape to his favorite ones and threw me a look as if to say "what are you kidding, I know what you are up to...not a chance"! I attempted to coerce him a bit more and he retorted with "mommy, we have my favorite popsicles, we just got them yesterday, remember, did you forget?"

The Blue Sky Stayed Up

I almost can't keep up with documenting all the cute, quirky, witty and poetic things that pass Cole's lips lately. I should carry a pad of sticky notes with me because things I think I will remember when he blurts them out in the car, at the playground or while running errands seem to disappear into the abyss that is my mind these days. Then I sit down to blog, journal or just jot a note (to remind myself of what I wanted to be reminded about) and I have to will my synapses to fire and spit back the memory that was only hour's old but is foggy already. Sheesh, I used to be as sharp as a tack...

Anyway, with long summer days upon us, there is light in the sky at 5am and light in the sky almost past 10pm. I love having days that seem to actually LAST instead of the cold dark winter days that seemed rushed and over way before my list of To-Do's is done. Cole still wakes in the morning on a farmer's schedule, up around dawn, ready to "let's go downstairs" and with fewer and fewer naps and more and more activity, he is exhausted and in bed way before the sun sinks into the horizon.

One morning a few weeks ago, Cole climbed into our bed at the 5am hour. He loves to look out of our skylights watching for clouds, airplanes, birds...as I began to shake the sleep from my eyes, I gazed at him gazing at the blue sky above. He turns to me, smiles and says "mommy, the blue sky stayed up". At first, my groggy self didn't understand and it must have showed on my face so he clarified for me "the blue sky didn't go night night, it stayed up". He had gone to bed the night before with us looking out his window at a helicopter that was flying over the house and he commented that the sky was really really blue. He obviously fell asleep with that thought and woke up to the same really really blue sky and pieced his thought together thinking that the sky never went to bed.

I love that I get to often see life through his eyes, it is wonderful, honest and real and makes the everyday things like a really really blue sky all the more special.

The "Sass" Factor...

Maybe it is the heat (and humidity) or maybe it is because it rained 22 out of the past 28 days but boy has Cole turned up his "sass" factor. I have been shocked at his outright brazen attitude as of late. Where has my sweet little boy gone a hiding?

The sheer amount of timeouts has grown exponentially over the past month. Did turning three and half flip some sassy switch? His preferred method for showing displeasure used to be a pouty lip, the question "why" or some tears. Recently, his retorts have taken a much bolder approach and as such his expressive use of backtalk is landing him on our "naughty step".

He has taken us both by surprise with not only his choice of words but the way in which he delivers his message. His smart-alecky tone has taken quite a turn and though I have been so dutifully careful as a parent to limit my moments of sarcasm/anger, it is obvious that Cole is mimicking my behavior in part as how else would he have learned to become so flippant. *sigh*

In SuperTarget the other day, I had asked him NOT to repeatedly open the freezer doors, NOT to knock on the bottles of spaghetti sauce as we walked down that aisle, NOT to pull the bananas apart...it was becoming the grocery trip where I just wanted to leave the cart and walk out. He sensed my growing frustration and finally backed off, tossing me a cheeky smile as if to say "okay, I'll behave for now....". I had breathed a sigh of relief and trudged on. We got in line for check-out and he kept pulling the cart out into the area beyond the registers as I attempted to load the bags and pay. I had already warned him that a timeout was imminent. Once again, he pulled the cart away and flashed me an impish grin. I roughly pulled the cart back and said "okay, I see you chose a timeout".. He decided to test me in front of the cashier and the growing line of people behind me. I swear with a rather amused expression he goes "No, mommy, we are at the store, you can't do that here". Oh really? Well, let's just say that the wall between the water fountains and the eye clinic was where he stood for the better part of four minutes with tears cascading down his face. I felt the heat in my own face as complete strangers made their unnecessary judgments but I knew it was what had to be been done.

Cole is definitely aware that he is on a slippery slope so I have been consistent with my discipline to this unwanted attitude. Hopefully it is just a phase of him experimenting with his growing independence. I don't mind him having an opinion but he will most certainly be learning to leave the sass at the door.