The BIG Phone...

So anyone who knows Dave well, knows that he has become an APPLE junkie. No, he isn't consuming apple pies or biting into a Red Delicious. I'm talking about finding ourselves with a growing arsenal of IPHONE, NANO, IPAD, and MAC paraphernalia taking up counter space in our house.

From an early age, Cole has been fascinated with our IPHONEs. Who can blame him with its fabulous sounds, music, kaleidoscope of colors and its ease to manipulate, what 2, 3 or 4 year old wouldn't be drawn to it? It is like being able to hold a TV in your hands.

As parents in this day and age, we fell unto its spell as well, both a blessing and a curse. It works oh so well for distracting Cole during meals at restaurants, during our day long Denham road trips, as well as honestly when we just need him out of our hair for a time.

I swear that a preschooler created and programmed these devices since Cole is more adept at its functions than I am. His ability to gentle tap or swipe his fingers across its screen still puts me in a state of awe as just moments before in many cases he was crashing his monster trucks and dropping matchbox cars down the stairs. He knows exactly where to locate the applications/games that I have downloaded and how to get beyond the "instruction" or "how to play" text.

When Dave brought home his IPAD last fall, it was so funny to sit back and watch my two guys with their new toy. With its bigger screen Cole couldn't get enough of it. First movies/shows, then larger than life race car and airplane simulation games. The sheer amount of detail on the interface makes me dizzy and yet, Cole is a pro, instructing me when I "do it wrong".

He began calling it the BIG PHONE since it was just on a larger scale from what our IPHONES were. The name stuck and months later as soon as Dave walks in the door from work, Cole requests to play with the BIG PHONE. He interacts it with so well, expertly putting puzzles together and shouting HURRAY; zooming race cars around their cyber-track making Vrroomming sounds; listening to stories; acquiring "stickers" when he chooses the missing letter or counts and chooses the correct number.

Cole has gotten quite attached to using the BIG PHONE and thus we have had to set some rules since he began attempting to negotiate his use with it. He is quite remarkable in his logic but we must remain in control and make him realize that the BIG PHONE is a privilege. Entertainment and educational merits aside, he is four years old and listening to him run around the house playing pretend far supersedes the value of the BIG PHONE.

Pull Up FREE Zone...

You can read all the books, listen and digest tons of advice but in reality you really just cross your fingers when your child has his mother's stubborn nature as there is no amount of praise (or bribes) that is going to make them potty trained unless they want to do it.

Cole showed his aversion to potty training from the get-go at age 2 or so and it wasn't until last spring at almost 3 1/2 after nearly 15 months of gentle coaxing and quite a bit of silly songs and general goofiness (oh, if only you had been a fly on the wall in our bathroom)that he finally learned to go "pee-pee" in the toilet. He refused however to even try to go poopy. Once he went "pee-pee" it was easy for him and we made him wear underwear during the day, to school and when he was home and we rarely had an accident.

We thought by having him wear underwear most of the day, it would force his hand when he had to go poopy. We were wrong, so wrong, as this method to try and get him to go poopy without a Pull-Up on backfired. He simply just held the urge to poop back and he would deliberately wait until he got into his pajamas and Pull-Up in the evening and then poop, typically quite uncomfortable because things were now backed up. Yes, I could have given him Miralax per our pediatrician's suggestion but I am not one to make such a choice for my child and manipulate his GI tract. If he had an accident because I gave him a stool softener that would more of a setback. So I went with my gut knowing eventually we would become a PULL-UP FREE house.

Around the holidays, I realized his PULL-UPs were dry in the morning which meant he didn't need it anymore and thus we began another round of trying to get him to poop on the potty at his very first grimace. He fought us and we pushed back firmly but lovingly. Since he was now smarter and more aware, his fears were more difficult to overcome. So we brought in the big guns...a fleet of Hot Wheels Monster Trucks...although bribes/treats/candy had NEVER worked in the past, Cole's eyes went wide as he looked at the shiny trucks all lined up in their packaging. We explained that if he pooped on the potty he could get one each time.

It was a bit rocky at first and we could see the very real trepidation in his eyes but after talking about train whistles (gas) followed by poopy trains (too much information I'm sure) and the inevitable tunnel (the flush), Cole finally began to relax and let nature take its course.

Once he pooped that first time and took his prize, he pooped almost every day for two weeks. Where all that poop came from we cannot fathom but we were all relieved (in more ways than one). Our most difficult task now was to wean his expectation of a monster truck post-poop. It has been a month since that milestone, and with no setbacks, I'm comfortable in stating that we are officially a PULL-UP FREE ZONE!

From the mouth of Cole...

I have literally begun keeping a "Note" on my IPHONE entitled COLE QUIPS. It is the cyber-equivalent of having a legal pad or notebook stashed in my bag, so that I can jot down the funny, fascinating or just plain fantastic things that are passing Cole's lips these days. It is quite amazing how knowledgeable and articulate he is about so many subjects as well as entertaining and witty.

He frequently catches me off guard with his random discourse, like the other day around dusk as we headed to tumbling class, from the backseat he sweetly says, "mommy, look at the beautiful sky, the clouds are kissing the sunset" . Indeed, the cloud bank was almost a horizontal line just sitting above the sliver of winter sun. It was the perfect description. He then melted my heart by saying "mommy, this is my favorite time of day". I felt that some inner DNA gene was at work since I have quite an affection for that interval just before the sun sets.

Cole is also perfecting the practice of cracking himself up. He likes to use nonsensical knock-knock jokes and then literally fall down laughing when he replies. Example: Cole: "Knock-Knock" Me: "Who's there?" Cole: "Plant" Me: "Plant Who?" Cole: "Plant goes YOO HOO" followed by him rolling on the couch in hysterics reminiscent of what I do when watching Robin Williams (well, not exactly but you get the overall picture).

I also love the fact Cole has no filter yet, that he speaks his mind, honest and forthright without pause. Although sometimes in the presence of others, I end up as the embarrassed one as I did the other day while picking him up at Montessori. Cole likes to bring home his work EVERYDAY and show Dave. I then typically hang his papers on the refrigerator or in the playroom or archive them into a folder I keep to later sort through for his yearly scrapbook. I have ALWAYS felt guilty at throwing any of his work away but alas, I certainly cannot keep everything and hence, I do toss out some random or less defining editions of his work. He twice in the past month found papers in the garbage can while disposing of "whatever" and came to me with such a look of despair on his face inquiring with a shaky voice "mommy, why did you throw my work in the trash!?" Both times, it was like someone kicked me in the gut. I tried to explain the best I could but at four years old, he simply and obviously had his feelings hurt and no explanation could fix that. So I pick him up the other day at school and as we tiptoe to the cubbies around the kids who are sitting quietly for storytime, Cole states loudly "now mommy, don't throw these out, okay?" I could have died as all three teachers looked our way.

Mommy Magic...

So anyone with a preschooler knows that you become quite knowledgeable about where the bathrooms are located at stores, the mall, restaurants and such. One of those parenting "skills" you never thought would make your day so much easier until your child becomes potty trained. You get so used to relying on diapers and Pull-Ups for so many years that potty training changes the game and can make doing errands or eating out to a whole new level.

Without fail and despite going potty before we leave the house, Cole inevitable has to go again once I have a full cart of groceries, when we are the farthest from the bathroom at the mall, or when our food has just been served. That is just Murphy's Law. I used to get frustrated at having to dash through Target carefully dodging others in an obstacle race through the store where we quickly stash the cart in an empty checkout aisle since the bathrooms are located on the paid side of the registers and make it just when he can barely hold it anymore. Now, I watch for the FIRST sign of him grabbing his crotch and despite his protest head directly towards the restroom.

Lately, when we are about to leave the house but before we put on our 100 layers of clothing I have asked Cole to go potty. He normally is already muttering that he doesn't want to stop playing (or watching Calliou which is his favorite PBS Kids show now since Calliou is also four like him). Anyway, I typically give him a warning, followed by a much more stern version of "please go to the bathroom right now". I rarely get to the point where I have to raise my voice thankfully.

He slowly (painstakingly so) will make his way to the bathroom and immediately say to me "I don't feel pee-pee coming". For awhile I didn't want to force him and making him try seemed to make sense. Oh but I learned, after several close mishaps in the car, that he almost always has to go, he just doesn't want to stop or be interrupted to do so.

So I pulled out the oldest trick in the book one morning as we were preparing to go out and as my patience was wearing thin as he shouted "I don't have to go pee-pee". I marched into the bathroom and turned on the faucet and walked out. I had barely made it to the kitchen when I heard him exclaim "mommy, the pee-pee is coming, wow, you made the pee-pee come". I peeked back in with a smile and simply said "mommy magic" as I turned off the faucet.

He finished up and came out with this look of amazement...at least for now, I can still invoke wonder in him...I know I won't have those opportunities too much longer but for now, I revel in knowing I still have my magic wand.