Okay seriously...

Anyone who I talk with even occasionally knows of our continued struggle with getting an uninterrupted night's sleep. Cole has been a challenge in the overnight department from day one. It was not until almost 10 months that we managed to get him to sleep without waking during the night. That was with trying every sleep behavior method published including the dreaded CIO (cry it out). Finally, we felt giddy that he was letting us snooze until 5am. For about two weeks, that glee endured. Then he slowly inched his waking from 5am to 4:50; 4:40; 4:30...over the course of a month or so, back to 3:30...then after some time stuck there, he edged forward and gradually landed at 4:35 where his morning alarm remained for the better part of 3 months.

In February, Cole saw a sleep specialist, as we wanted to be sure that there was nothing physically wrong with him that was keeping him (and us) on a farmer's schedule (though not even farmer's get up at 3:30?). He was not a good napper either, so we were concerned about his overall sleep deficit. I diligently kept a sleep log for a month, noting daily cycles. After meeting with the specialist, we were told, fortunately, that nothing was wrong with Cole, that he was a true early bird and an older baby needing less sleep on the sleep continuum. The doc said he is very active and curious and hitting all his milestones ahead of time so that he has a lot going on in his brain. We were doing all the right things as far as structured nap times and bedtimes but that Cole was processing a great deal of data and sometimes that results in less sleep. Cole was able to self soothe and be put in his crib awake. So despite the "good news" we were back to square one hoping for that one morning where he would sleep until AFTER the sun rose. Five months later, we are still hoping.

During this past spring and thus far this summer, we are still dealing with the periodic middle of the night wakings due to teething, illness or the unknown factor. Sometimes we can coax him back to sleep and sometimes he is ready for his day to commence. Sometimes he has a stretch of days where his internal clock regresses to 4:35 or earlier. Sometimes we make it to 5:20 and we whoop and holler, like we just struck gold.

Dave and I take turns waking with him at these ungodly hours, taking him downstairs so the other can cherish another hour's sleep. Rarely, once downstairs, can we snuggle him in for just 30 minutes more of shut eye; once in a blue moon as the saying goes.

I know we will sleep 8 hours STRAIGHT again in our life time but our bodies are so primed now for our pre-dawn awakening that we both stir before he actually wakes in order to avoid the adrenaline pumping jolt his cries induce.

We both know that Cole will be the teenager who can't get out of bed and oh the joy it will bring us to barge in with our cheery "Good morning"!!

Letting Cole be Cole...

Anyone who spends any time with us knows that I have let Cole wander the road of independence since he was just a baby. He continually is reaching major motor skill milestones ahead of his textbook peers. As his mom, I hope it is in part due to the fact that I let him go and explore even though he is discovering his world at a rate way beyond MY comfort zone as a first-time parent. It would be so easy to reign in his curious streak to quell my own uneasiness and in the name of risk management however it could undermine his courage and fearlessness, traits already so tenuous at his age.

My/our ability to let Cole become aware of his own capabilities has let him acquire the confidence he utilizes in all that he embarks upon. I/we want to continue to foster that by letting him absorb life on his terms. This is not to say that his routine is without structure, boundaries, discipline and/or limitations. These fixed parameters work for us and until they don't, that is our way.

It is scary for ME to let him go at an Olympic pace at such a young age (obviously within the confines of safe activity) but so necessary and vital to his growth. He just beams when he completes something different or realizes he has mastered a new skill. He flashes me his million dollar smile with such pride in his eyes as if to say "hey mom, look at me, did you see me do that!!??" With that momentum, he races on to see what else he can conquer! It is such an awesome feeling being the mom of a toddler who is so happy with himself!

I have let him tumble at the playground and pick himself up all the while being right at his side for support; I have let him experience frustration at trying to get the wheels on his truck unstuck, ensuring he knows I am there for him as he processes his impatience; I have let him tantrum after being told we need to go inside and held out my arms for when he is ready to move on from the moment; I have made myself aware of how important it is for him to have my attention and eye contact as he seeks my recognition of whatever it is he is engaged in.

But most importantly of all, I just let Cole be Cole, as that is how it should be.

C stands for
capricious
charming
cherubic
comical
contemplative
conversational
coy
creative
curious


O stands for
obdurate
observant
opinionated
orderly
original
outgoing

L stands for
lanky
likeable
lithe
loquacious
loud
lovable
lyrical

E stands for
eager
earnest
enchanting
energetic
entertaining
enthusiastic
expressive
exuberant
extraordinary

A Cole "original"...

The past six days have been all about bodily fluids, Cole's to be specific. A nasty GI bug took over my little guy's belly and gut and shook them all up. It is the sickest I have ever seen him and the most worried I have been in a long time.
Along with the vomiting and severe diarrhea was the sheer amount of time that he slept (of course most of it during the day and NOT at night) that had us both concerned, as even as a baby he never slept more than 11 hours in a row. Hopefully after continually spiking a fever each morning he is on the upside of recovering.

And so, being needed 110% this past week has left me without much energy to write. So I am posting a scan of the first collage Cole did at school last week. It is so fun to be hanging artwork of his scribbles. I am calling them Cole "originals".